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I`ve taken my fun where I`ve found it;
I`ve rogued an` I`ve ranged in my time;
I`ve `ad my pickin` o` sweet`earts,
An` four o` the lot was prime.
One was an `arf-caste widow,
One was a woman at Prome,
One was the wife of a jemadar-sais,[(]
An` one is a girl at `ome.
Now I aren`t no `and with the ladies,
For, takin `em all along,
You never can say till you ve tried `em,
An then you are like to be wrong.
There`s times when you`ll think that you mightn`t,
There`s times when you`ll know that you might;
But the things you will learn from the Yellow an` Brown,
They`ll `elp you an `eap with the White!
I was a young un at `Oogli,
Shy as a girl to begin;
Aggie de Castrer she made me,
An` Aggie was clever as sin;
Older than me, but my first un--
More like a mother she were--
Showed me the way to promotion an` pay,
An` I learned about women from `er.
Then I was ordered to Burma,
Actin` in charge o` Bazar,
An` I got me a tiddy live `eathen
Through buyin` supplies off `er pa.
Funny an` yellow an` faithful--
Doll in a teacup she were,
But we lived on the square, like a true-married pair,
An` I learned about women from `er.
Then we was shifted to Neemuch
(Or I might ha` been keepin` `er now),
An` I took with a shiny she-devil,
The wife of a nigger at Mhow;
`Taught me the gipsy-folks` bolee;[(]
Kind o` volcano she were,
For she knifed me one night `cause I wished she was white,
And I learned about women from `er.
Then I come `ome in the trooper,
`Long of a kid o` sixteen--
Girl from a convent at Meerut,
The straightest I ever `ave seen.
Love at first sight was `er trouble,
She didn`t know what it were;
An` I wouldn`t do such, `cause I liked `er too much,
But--I learned about women from `er!
I`ve taken my fun where I`ve found it,
An` now I must pay for my fun,
For the more you `ave known o` the others
The less will you settle to one;
An` the end of it`s sittin` and thinkin`,
An` dreamin` Hell-fires to see;
So be warned by my lot (which I know you will not),
An` learn about women from me!
What did the colonel`s lady think?
Nobody never knew.
Somebody asked the sergeant`s wife,
An` she told `em true.
When you get to a man in the case,
They`re like as a row of pins--
For the colonel`s lady an` Judy O`Grady
Are sisters under their skins!
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